So I'm going to let you in on a little secret. I'm pregnant. Pretty pregnant. I probably could qualify as 'heavily pregnant' at this point. Though I'm not sure, Matt and I had a long discussion last night over when a woman becomes 'heavily pregnant' versus just regularly pregnant.Anyway, babies require lots of stuff. Apparently to be a good parent you have to do things like clothe them, feed them and for society's sake, provide some sort of poop and pee catcher around their bums.
Well Matt and I are very responsible. And yeah, we thought we'd try to be good parents first, before we go the route of being just mediocre parents. And knowing that babies like diapers, we thought we'd be smart and spread out buying them. So we have been. Every time we go shopping and see deals on diapers, we buy them. We thought we were doing pretty well. Sure our grocery bills are now almost double than what they used to be, but hey, we're good parents.
At least that was our intention. Until we found how many diapers babies actually go through a week. Apparently, it's lots. And with all our buying on deals, we realized that we maybe have enough for a month.
Yikes, already this kid is costing us more than we thought it would. We looked into doing a return on the baby, but apparently it's a no refund/no return type of situation. So we did the next best thing, we've decided to think of ways to keep our diaper bills down. Here's what we came up with.
*We purchase a large tarp that we spread all over the living room floor. Baby is free to crawl/run/walk on it and does so with a bare bum. When nature calls, she is free to go wherever she's at. At the end of the day, we take the tarp outside, wash it off and leave it to dry for tomorrow.
*We train the baby to go in a litter box. We can even use litter like for a cat (we'd make sure it's the finest brand though), that way we can just scoop the poop/pee clumps out and save lots of money. Plus, if we get a cat, they can share.
*When we go out in public, we're going to take a page from the Chinese way of doing things, see in China the kids wear open bum pants and just go wherever they're at. At the time I thought it was nasty, but now I see the wisdom. Plus, she'll be half Chinese, so we can totally get away with it without too many dirty looks.
*We teach baby to inform us when she needs to go, then we just hold her over the toilet and she lets loose. Kids are doing some amazing things really early on, so we're confident our smarter than average kid will be able to handle it.
So there you have it. Some fool proof ways of cutting down the cost of diapers as well as instilling a sense of freedom in your child. You'll thank me, I promise.
Plus being good parents is way overrated. Our kid isn't going to get on American Idol or Survivor with a story about being raised by 'good parents'. Not enough sob factor.
