Friday 25 July 2008

Invaded!!



So I have a problem. Actually we have a problem. Matt and myself. I will speak for both of us from here on. I know, it's crazy, but I feel confident in doing so, because Matt and I have spoken about this subject several times and we're completely in agreement about it. Our problem is unfortunately a problem with infestation. And we're not the only ones in our building suffering from it. Nope, this infestation problem affects anyone who lives in our building or works in the business next door. It can also affect anyone who comes to visit us or anyone in our building. Regrettably, this infestation can't be cured by spraying pesticides or setting out traps, though the thought has crossed everyone's mind in my building to give it a try. Nope, this particular breed of pests just has to be tolerated. Though the infestation does settle down marginally once the summer ends.

I know, as you're reading this, you're probably worried that you might have a similar infestation. Or perhaps there's a chance you could be invaded with hoards of these pests. I have to say, it's possible, but not probable. This particular breed of pest comes depending on where you live, rather than the type of place you live in.

Are you ready for the name of this horrible, annoying soul suckers? Okay, here it is:

tourists

Yes, the breed I'm speaking about are tourists. We happen to live literally right next door to a very hot tourist spot. We get tourist groups congregating right outside our building, people graffiti-ing on the front walls of the business next door (and unbeknownst to them, the 'art' and 'words' get painted over every two months, so their loving tribute isn't actually there for ever and always, I'm sorry to be the one to break the news) and the worst part, stopping traffic. Unfortunately this 'hot spot' aka breeding ground for tourists is right in the middle of a road. And not just any road. A very busy road. A road with lots of traffic. Traffic that likes to honk because people are standing in the middle of the road, trying to recreate that very famous picture that took place in that spot many, many years ago.

Honestly, the tourists didn't bother me so much. I mean, I myself have been a tourist several times and have probably acted inappropriately once or twice. And granted, when we moved here, it was in the off season and there weren't nearly as many, but we thought they were kind of cute. We laughed to each other fairly smugly that we didn't have to pose for pictures, that we crossed that very street everyday, at least twice. We laughed at the earnest tourists and their attempts to cross the busy street. They were like little children, who don't realize how the world works yet. They were cute, and they were endearing, and yeah, we felt like big shots.

However, the summer started and our few tourists grew to several tourists (and when I say several, I don't think it's an exaggeration to say there are at least over a hundred a day). Every day. All day. And the honking of the traffic increased. And the annoyance of the tourists increased. And yeah, in order to maintain our sanity, we don't politely wait for them to finish taking their picture before we cross. No, now we just cross whether they're done or not. We don't want to be rude, it's just that if we stand there, we run the risk of a) being thought of as one of the Invading Ones and b) waiting there all day. That's not an exaggeration, seriously there are that many tourists.

The main problem with the pests isn't that they want to recreate a great picture, heck I'm a fan of the picture and want to recreate it myself someday. But there's a time and place. First of all, since this isn't an actual 'designated tourist' site, there's no type of regulation or instructions. People don't realize when they're at what's called a 'zebra crossing', cars have to stop to let you pass. When there's no light, like in this situation, the pedestrian always, always has the right of way. Well, a good recreation of The Picture doesn't have cars in it. So you get tourists standing there, as if they're waiting to cross, the cars stop, just like they're supposed to, and the tourists just wave their hands trying to encourage the cars to continue driving. That's illegal for the cars to do. And it causes the cars to pile up, honk their horns and all sorts of confusion runs riot.

Sometimes you get people who aren't such purists about whether there are cars in their picture or not and so they'll cross. The problem then is, that they stop in the middle of the road while, trying to get in the 'pose' while they get their picture taken. We seriously saw this happen the other day and there were a good six cars on either side waiting and honking. And the people were just standing there, posed. It was a very ridiculous situation and we didn't blame the cars honking one bit.

So if you're so inclined to become one of these mighty invaders and you know (or figured out from my not so cryptic descriptions) where I'm talking about. Let me give you a few helpful hints. We've already covered that cars have to stop, it's the law. Well, if you're going to take the picture, have your photographer in position and when you're ready, stand next to the road. When the cars stop cross just like you would. It's even okay to take a slightly (note the key word is slightly) slower pace, but always keep moving. If you don't want cars in your picture, either wait it out and cross when there is a slow down in traffic (rare, it's a busy road) or come at a time when there's not much traffic. One time we've found that is really good is Sunday morning. Every morning when we go to church, we leave around 8am, and the road is absolutely empty. Of both cars and tourists. It's the perfect chance to get that 'perfect' picture.

Oh and if you happen to come at the same time as everyone else and you're holding up traffic and your picture gets ruined by someone who crossed while you did carrying toilet paper. Yeah, that's probably me. Or Matt. And you know what? We're not sorry.

7 comments:

Mak said...

ha ha- It sounded like a much better location in theory, then? Poor Kate and Matt! Poor tourists with their special picture ruined by you guys and your toilet paper.

Have you noticed you mention buying TP a lot? :) Do they only sell it in single rolls in Jolly ole England?

Bek said...

Good one.

Think of how many photo albums you are in all across the world...

Do you hate buying toilet paper?

CKW said...

Now I feel sheepish that I was ever a tourist there! Although I never did pose at that cross walk, I definitely posed at some other sites in some dumb way.

Bek said...

Don't worry about it Cyndi, THEY come over here and take pictures on the LV strip and with the GG bridge...so it is even!

Kate said...

Mak and Bek: Actually we hate toilet paper. We've decided to go with a more eco-friendly approach, we use cloths. In fact, it's the towels hanging behind out bathroom door, we just search for a clean spot each time, when we can't find any, it's time to do some laundry!

Okay, the actual answer is that a giant thing of TP is (in my opinion) one of the things you feel most ridiculous carrying around London. Everything else you can understand, everyone need groceries and/or walks around in a backpack, but not many carry TP. And you have to admit, it's a great picture wrecker moment!

Cynj: That's the thing, we're all tourists sometime, there's no shame in that. The purpose of the post was to reflect on life in a very high tourist area, but since it's not really a tourist spot, it gets crazy. It'd be like if someone stopped in the middle of the GG bridge in SF to get that 'perfect picture', okay, maybe not that extreme, but you can understand how it would get really, really annoying after awhile.

Don't be ashamed of your tourism, just be sensitive to your surroundings, that's all I ask.

CKW said...

...I have been changed...for good.

Anonymous said...

I think tourists can and should be tourists. I love being a tourist!!! Wish I could be one on your doorstep right now!!! You just can't help it. Hey....You were a tourist once!!!

jmk